I am nothing if not grateful for this life I’m living. I am imperfect and I’m thankful for that. Perfection is such a hard target to reach and then too stressful to maintain. Waaaaaay too much work! I’ve got other important and unimportant stuff on my plate. I have a wonderful and imperfect husband. Thank God, because if he were perfect, it’d show up my imperfections all the more. We threw away our pedestals years ago and have our feet firmly planted on terra firma! Which is a good thing because we have 3 amazing and perfectly imperfect children! They are my JOY! But if I weren’t completely and happily entrenched in this life, raising them would knock me on my butt for sure! We are NOT the Cleavers. We are NOT keeping up with the Jones’. We are so much closer on the spectrum to the Munsters but we are making a good run of it. My home is… well… a mess, pretty much ALL the time! Inside and out! I have 3 kids, 2 dogs, 2 cats, 2 fish, a husband who works and studies and 3 jobs (FT Mom, PT contractor to LIU’s CCI and PT editor for F&S). That doesn’t include dabbling as a DIYer in this old house, child advocate, Partners in Policymaking student, Down syndrome and happiness blogger, teacher, wife, friend, daughter, sister, housekeeper (ha!), laundress, gardener, landscaper, seasonal pool boy, etc. You get the picture?
In the perfect world, I’d have enough money to pay folks to do all these things for me so I could spend 3 hours a day at the gym with my perfect trainer, 2 hours in the beautician’s chair, a couple of hours consulting with the plastic surgeon, all so my home and I could look beautiful… but I’d still be 48 going on 49 and the kids would still need me. A real me. I’d still be me on the inside. I’d be looking over that fence and over my shoulder, waiting for life to catch up to me. I just can’t live like that. The way I’m living today, I’m not running away, I’m not chasing it down, I’m facing it head on. One day at a time. I like it this way.
Oh heck yes, I’d like to finish the front of the house but the Department of Health says wait until the kids are older so disturbing the lead paint doesn’t poison them! Will do! I’d love a new couch for my living room and one for the great room, but the kids are still in training and the cats still have their claws and the dog still tries daily to sit on it… so it’d be a waste of money just now. In short order, 2 new couches would look just like these 2 old couches. Instead, I’m teaching myself and my kids patience, acceptance and the value of money. Hubby really wants a kitchen island but the table we have works, for now. A yardful of sod would be awesome but the dogs would still… well, ya know, do their business on it. A svelte body would be “da bomb” (if I covet anything, it’s that) but then I’d have to work hard and spend the time to maintain it. I don’t have time for that kind of effort or maintenance anymore. I have kids to raise and a life to live. And, the body I’ve got has served me well. It’s like a dear old friend who’s been with me through it all. I respect that!
Life is imperfect and I’m living mine imperfectly. This mindset is not just how I cope with the daily challenges… It’s how I live. I laugh every day along with doing the laundry and the dishes. I breathe in the bouquet of my life every minute of every day even when it includes the foul smell of… ah, I won’t go into it. I love and I hug my children and my husband throughout the day. Nothing beats a real hug from someone you love and who loves you back! I eat and sleep each day and night. And I reap what I sow. I get it all back tenfold… daily!
I can’t worry about how things look to others or when this or that is going to happen. That just hurts me. This is my life and it’s well lived in. It’s that simple!
Yes, I do believe it’s a glorified life. And yes, these are rose-colored glasses I’m wearing. I have gold-colored glasses too… they make the world look bright and sunny. Call me a fool, if you want… but I am not false. This is real. I love my life (mostly). Yes there are tough things going on at times–we all have them–but I choose to get through those with humor and optimism and focus on the good. It works for me.
Try a pair of rose- or gold-colored glasses on and take a walk on the happy side, just for today. It might work for you.